operation: get your stalk on (may 04)

for an intimate glipse into my sad, sad life... read this exchange between me and my college friend Lauri.

"Operation: Get Your Stalk On"

out of general boredom/seeking some bit of excitement, i've begun "operation: get your stalk on (may 04)".

operation: get your stalk on involves this girl at my job. she's 5'8" or 5'9" slender blonde with runners legs and a pretty girl/kind of ugly girl face. she either dresses really sharp or looks super sloppy. she usually has a pissy look on her face. i never see her with anyone.. she's always either reading by herself or i've seen her in the cafe by herself. a couple of times last fall i saw her meet up for lunch with some business casual guy, but i haven't seen that since i decided to begin casually paying attention to her behavioral patterns a month or two ago.

i want to purposely meet her and talk to her and pick her head and crack the code: why doesn't she have any friends at work? is she really shy? is she a bitch? is she mentally ill? so far nobody i've asked even knows her name. she's been here at least as long as i have. i'll meet her and report.

Tim

---

OK- I love operation get your stalk on. I used to stalk big time in college for laughs or to see how far I could go with something- it usually led to some good drunken make out sessions. I kind of miss stalking.

I feel bad for this girl with no friends. Timmy I have no friends at work, a little bit because sometimes I can be shy around people I don't know but mainly just because the people I work with are totally LAME. Maybe your work chick would love just having someone down to earth say HI.

- Lauri

---

Lauri,

As of 0855 hours I have to abort operation: get your stalk on.

this morning i was running late and i got on the brown line (L) near the back of the train/i'm usually near the front.

and when we got to the southport (white bread yuppie) stop, i was standing at the door and my fucking target walked right in. she looked ok... she had her pissy bored bitch look going on.

and i was thinking "FUCK YEAH I'm going to get my stalk on right now." so i smiled at her and she smiled back and i said "good morning."

then then THEN i noticed the motherfuckin huge diamond engagement ring on her finger... which i hadn't noticed before, and i'm certain i looked.

so it added up... southport... pissy bored bitchy look... huge engagement ring... no friends at work...

my profiling/recon work paid off. my friend reuben said it best: "you threw it out to the universe and got your answer." (i mean the fuckin target walked right on to the motherfuckin train that i was running late on and i got to see her ring).

searching for a new target...