self destructive(?)

Timer set for self destruction?

I don't know much about the bloodline on my father's end. We don't talk about it. I do know this much: Granddad Burdick drank himself to death by 60. All of his brothers and his father met similar early deaths due to the bottle.

My father doesn't drink, and in fact gets dizzy on 3 beers,.. but the man has smoked Camel straights (filterless) for over 40 years. Ever try one? Pure toxin. Now that he's getting up there in age, he's decided to be better to himself and switched to Marlboro reds.

My genetic code has predisposition me to have a high tolerance rate for alcohol (great granddad on my mom's side was an infamous drunk who carried a pistol at the turn of the century for killing purposes), and I've found that I can easily stay with, if not outdrink many.

At the top of May over a couple tumblers of Canadian Club on ice, my friend Rick questioned why most of his crew were self destructive. Being a part of that pool, I asked if he thought that I was self destructive. Rick then began to list his reasons. Some of it sounded true, some of it was finger pointing. I was sure to volley back a few examples Rick's way, and we ended with a truce and a challenge: go the rest of the month without a drop of alcohol. Easy enough, Rick.

A week later Rick was over at my place and admitted that he'd had a couple beers over the weekend. I hadn't touched the stuff, so I won the bet and poured a pair of tumblers of CC on ice.

So, am I self destructive? I don't think so. If nothing else I seem to take things to the extreme in most directions. I'm quietly driven. But, it's gotten me what I want so far, so why fuck with it?